Beauty of Hijab

January 15, 2012

How to Deal With Sadness and Loss of Loved Ones

December 9, 2011
Allah Ar-Rahman

By Abida Aura Mustafa

Whether through death, loss, or disagreement, when we lose someone or something dear to us, we become overwhelmed by the pangs of grief; the pain of loss feels overbearing as though it would never end. Having to face the consequences of detachment can be a traumatic experience. All we can think of is the pain enshrouding our hearts and consuming our minds. With tears streaming down our faces, our faces contorted with emotion and our hearts too feeling as though a heavy burden has landed—the misery takes a hold of us and, blinded by our tears, we fail to see the light.

But there is a light; a light to behold even in the darkest corner of the earth, even in the murkiest depths of the ocean. We don’t have to drown in the quicksand of trauma. Nothing and nobody by Allah’s Will subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He) has the ability to overpower the underlying depth of:

Inna lilLahi wa inna ilayhi raji`oon.

Verily, unto God do we belong and, verily, unto Him we shall return.

When we actually give some time and thought to reflect upon the words which constitute this statement, we come to realise that there is an extremely powerful and truthful message behind it—an answer to all our questions, grief and emotions.

This profound phrase captures the essence of our entire existence; it encapsulates where we came from and also where we are headed:

Allah

Understanding the statement has the ability to eradicate regrets and past events. It holds the key to finding contentment during those times when we think, ‘Why did that have to happen?’ We can become immersed in questioning, and drown in the misery of relentless searching for the answer…Or we can discover patience by asserting that regardless of whatever has occurred, we will indeed return to Allah (swt).

When we truly understand the meaning of inna lilLahi wa inna ilayhi raji`oon, we find that no sadness will last forever, and that we shouldn’t destroy ourselves by holding even the slightest bitterness or anger within us. By understanding that Allah (swt) is the One, the only One to Whom we belong, we should be able to move on from painful moments in our life (which we should assert as not being able to occur except that Allah (swt) Willed for it to be) and strive for our goal of meeting Him.

There should be no space for bitterness or anger when one truly comprehends the deep truthfulness of this phrase, and we should be able to forgive those who have intentionally or unintentionally wronged us because we know that Allah (swt) alone holds all sovereignty and that even our emotions belong to Him. By forgiving ourselves and others, by showing sabr(patience) in the face of death or loss, and by aspiring for Allah’s Mercy and Judgement, we open ourselves to a whole new level of understanding ourselves in the context of space and time. We can understand by His Will that Allah (swt) is all that matters, and everything else in this dunya (current life, world) is a means for us to reach Him because we want to be able to See Him at the end, for without a doubt we will have to return to Him.

‘Inna’ meaning ‘verily’ tells us that with certainty we belong to Allah (swt), that is, He Created us and bestowed on us our beginning without a doubt. ‘Inna’ occurs twice in this phrase, providing an emphasis on the certainty of Allah’s Ever-Lasting existence, emphasising the certainty of our beginning AND our end. So Allah (swt) is Al-Awwal (the Beginning, the First) and Al-Akhir (the End, the Last). Al-Awwal ul Akhir (The Ever-Lasting) is the source of light in every single moment of despair, hardship, and difficulty where our tears and grief blind us. Instead of allowing or hearts and souls to become blinded by the darkness of sadness, we can train ourselves in times of positive feelings and negative feelings to find contentment in Allah’s Decree, for nothing happens without His Decreeing it.

Allah (swt) tells us in Surah Baqarah, verses 155-156:

 And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-Sabirun (the patient). Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: “Verily! To Allah we belong and verily, to Him we shall return.” (Qur’an 2:155-156)

This is our Lord, the One Who Created us when we were nothing, telling us in His Divine Book—tanzil (sent down) to humans and jinn as a dhikr (reminder)—that He will definitely test us with trials, but that He has Promised reward for those who are patient.

And how do we be ‘patient’ in the face of turmoil?

Just as Allah (swt) has created tests involving struggle, risk and loss, Allah (swt) has also told us how to approach these tests; He has revealed to us that the patient are those who, when afflicted with calamity, say, “Inna lilLahi wa inna ilayhi raji`oon.” In His infinite Mercy, Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala has allowed for relief to accompany difficulty. This also shows us that the losses and difficulties won’t last forever, and that everything which we regard as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ in the dunya is of temporal nature.

No pain or grief or disagreement can last forever, but with certainty, Allah (swt) lasts forever and from Him we came to be and it is to Him we will with certainty return.

This means that the events which take place in this dunya are mere moments. We become so consumed by our grief that we fail to see that al-Qahhar (the Conqueror, the Ever-Dominating) has provided us with light and that even in the most difficult times, Allah (swt) provides ease with hardship. Read the rest of this entry »


Enjoining What is Right, Forbidding What is Wrong

April 23, 2011
"Dongxiang minority student discussing a ...
Image via Wikipedia

Article written by Muhammad Alshareef.

Ashaab As-Sabt – the people of Saturday. They were a townsfolk from Bani Israel who were tested with the Sabbath, the day when they were to leave their worldly affairs and be devout to Allah. All week long they would go fishing with scant return. But on Saturdays, when they were required to put aside their activities, the fish would come in abundance. A test from Allah!

“Ask them (O Muhammad) concerning the town standing close by the sea. Behold! they transgressed in the matter of the Sabbath (i.e. Saturday). For on the day of their Sabbath their fish did come to them, openly holding up their heads, but on the day they had no Sabbath, they came not: thus did We make a trial of them, for they were given to transgression.” (Surah Al Araf 7:163)

A group of the townsfolk transgressed, not satisfied with Allahs commandments devising a scheme to by-pass the commandment. They would put out their fishing nets on Friday, and then on Sunday they would come and pick the nets up. Now all the Saturday fish would be caught.

The townsfolk divided into 2 groups when they saw the grave evil and sin that was befalling. The first group tried to advise the transgressors and warn them of the horrific consequences of their action – commanding the good and forbidding the evil.

Thinking they had no responsibility for what was taking place, the other group just went about minding their own business, holding that Allah would eventually destroy the sinners.

And when a community among them said, “Why do you preach to a people whom Allah is about to destroy or to punish with a severe torment?”

Listen carefully to the reply of the first group.

“When some of them said: “Why do you preach to a people whom Allah will destroy or visit with a terrible punishment?”- said the preachers: “To discharge our duty to your Lord, and perchance they may fear Him.”" (Surah Al Araf 7:164)

So the first group spoke out against the disobedience that was taking place for two reasons: One, so that they would be pardoned before Allah because they tried to hold back the transgressors. And two, so that perhaps the transgressors may hear the reminder and turn back to Allah. It was only this group that survived.

“When they disregarded the warnings that had been given them, We rescued those who forbade Evil; but We visited the wrong-doers with a grievous punishment because they were given to transgression. When in their insolence they transgressed (all) prohibitions, We said to them: “Be ye apes, despised and rejected.”" (Surah Al Araf 7:165-166)

In one sweeping night, the punishment rained down and they were transfigured into pigs and monkeys.

Dear brothers and sisters, it is the nature of a human being to feel the need to do good or feel the drive to indulge in evil. Even if we were to be alone, deserted and secluded, we would still feel a drive to do good or indulge in evil.

But as for our ummah, it should of our characteristic to only do good. And we should not only do good ourselves, but we must encourage others to do good; we must be the driving force. And we should not only distance ourselves from vice, but we must forbid others from doing it also, we must be the obstacle.

Dear brothers and sisters, if we all had Muslim identification badges, and the badge was valid, the description that would go on the badge would read: This man/woman commands the good and forbids evil, for this is how Allah described us.

“Ye (true believers in Islam) are the best of peoples, evolved for mankind, enjoining what is right, forbidding what is wrong, and believing in Allah…” (Surah Ali Imran 3:110)

Good and evil. When it comes to encouraging one or the other, there are two groups of people. The first are those who encourage others to do good and advise them to stop the evil they may be committing. These are the muminoon and muminaat, the believing men and women, the ones that shall be favored by Allah’s Mercy:

“The Believers, men and women, are protectors one of another: they enjoin what is just (al-maruf), and forbid what is evil (al-munkar): they observe regular prayers, practice regular charity, and obey Allah and His Apostle. On them will Allah pour His mercy: for Allah is Exalted in power, Wise.” (Surah Al Tawbah 9:71)

The second group of people are those who encourage others towards evil and stop them whenever they see them doing acts of virtue. These are the munaafiqoon and munaafiqaat, the hypocrite men and women who Allah shall shun.

“The Hypocrites, men and women, (have an understanding) with each other : They enjoin evil (al-munkar), and forbid what is just (al-maruf), and are close with their hands. They have forgotten Allah; so He hath forgotten them. Verily the Hypocrites are rebellious and perverse.” (Surah Al Tawbah 9:67)

The Quran tells us that the winners, those that attain success, are those Muslim men and women who command the good and forbid the evil. And Allah teaches us that He cursed nations before us because they lost this characteristic of encouraging good and forbidding evil:

“Curses were pronounced on those among the Children of Israel who rejected Faith, by the tongue of David and of Jesus the son of Mary: because they disobeyed and persisted in excesses. Nor did they (usually) forbid one another the iniquities which they committed: evil indeed were the deeds which they did.” (Surah Al Maidah 5:78-79)

Read the rest of this entry »


There are Times in Life, You Just Have to Laugh

March 3, 2011

I just had to post this article to share with you all,,from the son of a dear friend, Ahmad makes an important point that too often we forget. Sometimes life just runs away with us and we need to find a way to put on the brakes!!! Enjoy and watch his link for future interesting posts..

 

 

A typical day for me consists of being locked up in a classroom on campus all day and then coming home to enjoy the constant yelling of my 2 year old sister…there’s no such thing as silence in our home. A couple nights ago I get home, sit at the table, start eating dinner and working on my laptop. Being the nosy little thing that she is my sister comes by pokes around in my backpack, try’s to pick food off my plate and is just being a nuisance. Later on she asks me to open the wrapper to a chocolate for her. I open the wrapper and she runs off happily. A few minutes later the troll returns, sits next to me and smiles. (She might only be 2 but she knew exactly what she was about to do) Smiling, she looks at me, throws the chocolate at me and then immediately smacks her chocolate infested hands all over the keyboard on my MacBook…now I’m livid. At the time I was PISSED! But I’m writing about it now and laughing as I look at her.

washing a keyboard

not recommended

Sometimes we need to stop for a second and ask ourselves how significant is what just happened. Steven Covey wrote about the 90/10 principle; “10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react.” Had I taken this principle into consideration before steaming through my ears I probably would’ve laughed and taken a few good photos I could have posted. Instead I just have a bunch of words on a page and a little sister who will probably do it again since she gets a kick out of making me mad. All it really took was the swipe of a paper towel to clean the mess, so I obviously overacted to such an insignificant thing.

Were always going to be faced with some type of adversity or hardship no matter what we do in life. But don’t be afraid to just pause for a moment and laugh, you’d be amazed at how much more fun things are when your not taking them so seriously.

from: http://ahmadtaleb.tumblr.com/post/3414863283/sometimes-you-just-have-to-laugh?sms_ss=facebook&at_xt=4d6fdd85a7d5ade2,0


Advice for Marriage

February 18, 2011

Salam,

I hope this information will give us all some good background information on what an ideal husband or wife should behave like.

1. Fear Allah: It was the noble practice of Nabi (SAW) to be conscientious about the fear of Allah before performing a Nikah by reciting the verses (Nisa v14, Ahzab v69, Aali-Imraan v101) from the Quraan. All the verses are common in the message of Taqwa (fear of Allah). The spouses will be first committed to Allah before being committed to their partner. There can be no doubt in the success of a marriage governed by the fear of Allah.

2. Never be angry at the same time: Anger is the root cause for all marital disputes. One Sahabi came to Rasulullah (SAW) and sought some advice. Rasulullah (SAW) replied, control your anger. The same advice was rendered three times. (Mishkaat pg.433; HM Saeed)

anger is one letter away from danger
3. If one has to win an argument, let it be the other: Nabi (SAW) said: “Whoever discards an argument despite being correct shall earn a palace in the center of Jannah. (Ibid pg.412)

4. Never shout at each other unless the house is on fire: Luqman (AS) while offering advice to his son said: ” and lower your voice for verily the most disliked voice is that of a donkey”. (Surah Luqman v19)

5. If you have to criticize, do it lovingly: Rasulullah (SAW) said, ‘A Mu’ min is a mirror for a Mu’min.’ (Abu Dawud vol.2 pg.325; Imdadiyah) Advise with dignity and silently.mirror

6. Never bring up mistakes of the past: Nabi (SAW) said: “Whoever conceals the faults of others, Allah shall conceal his faults on the day of Qiyaamah.” (Mishkaat pg.429; HM Saeed)

7. Neglect the whole world rather than your marriage partner:Nabi (SAW) confirmed the advice of Salman to Abu-Darda [RA] for neglecting his wife. “Verily there is a right of your wife over you.” (Nasai Hadith2391)

8. Never sleep with an argument unsettled: Abu Bakr [RA] resolved his dispute with his wife over-feeding the guests before going to bed. (BukhariHadith 602)

9. At least, once everyday, express your gratitude to your partner: Nabi [sallallaahu alayhi wasallam] said, ‘Whoever does not show gratitude to the people has not shown gratitude to Allah.’ (Abu Dawud pg.662; Karachi)

10. When you have done something wrong, be ready to admit it and ask for forgiveness: Nabi [sallallaahu alayhi wasallam] said, ‘All the sons of Aadam commit error, and the best of those who err are those who seek forgiveness.’ (Tirmidhi Hadith 2499)


KINDNESS TO PARENTS

February 12, 2011

by Musa Sadiqueuallah

 

holding a baby hand

 

Last week a terrible incident happened to one of my closest friend’s relative, a 91 years old father & mother, were thrown out from their own house, by their own two sons in Dhaka. The elderly couple had distributed all their several houses and properties to their sons & daughters. Do they really deserve this kind of treatment being parent ?

 

Now a days, I am not sure why people, keep their most beloved parents in “Old Homes”. Won’t they deserve a liitle love & affection from their flesh & blood!

 

The parents are entitled by right to kind and dutiful treatment from their children. Since this is an important duty that Allah emphasized so strongly, it is essential for every human being to know what constitutes kind treatment of parents. It is no exaggeration to say that for a believer, to be a dutiful son or daughter is to take the way that surely leads to heaven.

 

We note first that Islam uses the Arabic word birr in connection with children’s attitude towards their parents. The term connotes kindness, compassion, benevolence, and almost every aspect of good and generous treatment of others. One of Allah’s own attributes is derived from this root. Allah is the “Barr,” which means that His kindness, compassion, grace, and generosity never fail. Scholars say that this term includes everything that is good.

 

In Surah Luqman Aya : 14 “And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years give thanks to Me and to your parents, unto Me is the final destination.”

Read the rest of this entry »


MOTHERHOOD: THE HAND WHICH ROCKS THE CRADLE ROCKS THE WORLD

January 29, 2011



Muslim mother teaching her children

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Motherhood: The pivot of humanity

 

By Faraz Omar | Saudi Life

Tuesday, 25 May 2010 09:06

(this article was used from Saudi Life link: http://saudilife.net/life-and-society/92-life-and-society/222-motherhood-the-pivot-of-humanity)

I WILL never forget the 15-day summer Islamic classes I was part of in India in 2005. It was the first time I was teaching a class of toddlers. They were surely going to be different from the older boys I was used to. It was also the first time I would teach girls. That hardly crossed my mind though. Toddlers are all the same (be they boys or girls), was my presumption.

Boy, was I wrong!

A week of classes later, a tiny girl came up to me shyly and handed me a glittery paper that said something like this: “Dear brother Faraz, I like you. Thank you for teaching us Seerah of the Prophet (peace be upon him). With love, so-and-so.”

I was taken aback, spell-bound and totally at loss of words. It was the first time I received such a loving letter. I thanked her a lot and then thought about it the whole day. The following days more and more girls came up with bigger letters that were more decorated and more loving.

The boys? Ha! Good one. Seated on the left-hand-side of the same classroom, they didn’t even bother to know what was happening. Not a word of thanks! All they knew was, “It’s time to play when the bell rings.”

That experience was when I realized, being the typical male I am, how tender the hearts of girls were. That was when I could truly appreciate this creation of Allah. He created males and females with different characteristics – strengths and weaknesses – that would complement each other and suit the roles they were to play. And toddlers are closer to the natural state in which children are born.

The emotional strength, the love and the care a woman is blessed with cannot be fully expressed in words. But it can be felt in the boundless mercy and sacrifice of a mother (and wife).

For nine months she carries the child – a sentence that’s a cliché now, but the miracle certainly not – and she delivers through the pangs and pains of labor – what no macho man on earth will have the strength to bear, let alone be capable.

When the baby arrives in her hands, her pains are forgotten, her struggles are not worthy anymore (in her eyes), because her heart is already with the apple of her eye. She then goes through sleepless nights only so her baby would sleep tight; her comfort and respite is in her baby’s delight; and her sadness is in her baby’s unhappiness. She brings up the baby teaching everything it needs until it’s ready to face the world and contribute to the continuation of humanity.

Social engineering

One of the greatest crimes of our generation – an outrageous blasphemy, a satanic deception – is that the world today doesn’t appreciate women for who they are, for what they do, and for the crucial role they play. Feminism, heavily promoted by the media, has wrecked havoc across countries by redefining the social balance. Read the rest of this entry »


Verily, After Hardship Comes Ease…

January 22, 2011

At a time in which the Muslims are beset with trials from every periphery, it is a time when Muslims should continue being Muslims, only better Muslims. I would say to my dear brothers and sisters in Islam “don’t be Sad”; if you are on the true religion – believing in One God and all the Messengers sent to mankind, then don’t be sad.

“…Bear with patience whatever befalls you….” (Qur’an 31:17) and “Be not sad, surely Allah is with us.” (Qur’an 9:40)

Our Prophet (pbuh) said: “Verily, if Allah loves a people, He makes them go through trials. Whoever is satisfied, for him is contentment, and whoever is angry upon him is wrath.” [Tirmidhi]

Being sad is not encouraged in Islam

“So do not become weak, nor be sad…” (Qur’an 3:139)
“And grieve not over them, and be not distressed because of what they plot.” (Qur’an 16:127)

Sadness prevents one from action instead of compelling one towards it. The heart does not benefit through grief. The most beloved thing to the devil is to hinder the worshipper in the path of Allah. The Muslim must repel sadness and fight in any way that is permissible in Islam.

Allah is sufficient for us

“Allah is sufficient for us, and He is the best Disposer of affairs. So they returned with Grace and Bounty from Allah. No harm touched them; and they followed the good Pleasure of Allah. And Allah is the owner of Great Bounty.” (Qur’an 3:173-174)

“And put your trust in Allah if you are believers indeed…” (Qur’an 5:23)
“O you who believe! Seek help in patience and the prayer…” (Qur’an 2:153)

By leaving your affairs to Allah by depending on Him, by trusting in His promise, by being pleased with His decree, by thinking favourably of Him, and by waiting patiently for His help, you reap some of the greater fruits of faith. When you incorporate these qualities, you will be at peace concerning the future, because you will depend on your Lord for everything. As a result, you will find care, help, protection and victory.

for the rest of this article please visit: http://mudassirsworld.blogspot.com/2009/07/verily-after-hardship-comes-ease.html#ixzz1BngKI01t

 



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